Day 20: Halfway

Here we are! 20 days into our 40 day prayer journey. How are you guys feeling?

I know that it’s been a tough week for many of us. My health is still getting the best of me over the past couple of days and tonight I did something no one should EVER do: research symptoms on the internet. Ya’ll – I have self diagnosed myself with all kinds of crazy things!! Stop it.

Regardless of my circumstances, I am reflecting on how I have been changed in the past 20 days. Just yesterday I wrote in my journal: God, can you believe how far we’ve come?

It doesn’t matter if you’ve taken baby steps, crawled and dragged your exhausted self to your daily appointments, or struggled and made up missed time. The point is: You are still here. And God is still listening. And God is moving.

And there are victories!! Just this morning I got a text from one of our team members that gave praise for an answer to the very first prayer she started circling on this journey. Praise the Lord!

And there are more stories. Some we may never know in this lifetime. Things are being birthed in every single one of us during this journey that will have outcomes across generations. Can ya’ll even imagine the impact of all of our prayers? Can you picture generations to come that will reap the benefits of our daily appointments with God? Awesome.

Today’s reading spoke to me in such a special way.

I’m about to get super personal and share something that is extremely close to my heart and family. And I’m probably gonna type too much. So if you’re bored, just move on and don’t feel bad. I won’t even know if you don’t read it…really.

Before I even had a thought about starting this 40 day challenge, God was dealing with me very specifically about 2 things: obedience and my job.

I’ve felt an uneasiness in my role at work for a while and a tugging that I am supposed to be following my calling in a way like never before. One minor detail: I have no clear definition what that calling is supposed to be at this point. Scary stuff? Yep. I have a few ideas and dreams, but there have been no stone tablets sent down from God telling me the way.

All I know is I’m supposed to be writing. And writing has taken a back seat – mostly because our family and my work took up all of my time. I just didn’t have much left to give to writing.

Several weeks before starting this 40 day challenge, I had a conversation with a friend. She made the statement, “What if God is preparing you to walk away from your job without knowing what is next?”

Seriously? Who does that? Not me. I work with my husband, ya’ll. How’s that gonna go over? “Oh honey, I quit. But I don’t know what I’m gonna do.” Crazy. Insane. Borderline psycho.

I have always had in my mind that God would give or at least show me the next thing and THEN I could move on from my work in our family business. What if that isn’t His plan?

Did you read this one line in today’s reading yet?

There are moments in life when you need to quit a job, make a move, or end a dating relationship. And you need to take that step without knowing what the next step will be. Don’t wait for more revelation; be obedient to the amount of revelation God has given you.(pg 113 – Draw the Circle)

Did you catch that? No, not the part about ending a dating relationship!! Ha! Quit a job…make a move…take that step without knowing what the next step will be…be OBEDIENT! Did somebody call up Mark Batterson and tell him about me?>??

Ok, God. I’m listening.

Then there’s the very next page:

Our failure to act on what we know God is calling us to do not only breeds doubt and discouragement; it’s a form of disobedience. (pg 114 – Draw the Circle)

Ouch. And do I dare tell you all that God has even been very clear over the past couple of weeks with taking things away from me at work? I’ve been standing in the way…for a very long time. And I have been breeding doubt and discouragement..big time!

I want so badly to be like Abraham and GO without even knowing the final destination. That takes an insane amount of faith and trust. More than I have on my own at this moment. I’ve got to spend some extra time seeking God and asking Him to take over – get me out of the way. I’ve got to ask for courage to be bold and to take the next step, no matter what.

I don’t know what kind of crazy things God is prompting you to do, but I will be the one that leads the pack. When someone tells you how crazy you are, just tell them about this even CRAZIER girl that is leading our prayer challenge. She’s insane.

The problem is that most of us want the twenty-five year plan before we’re willing to step out in faith. We want to know exactly where we’re going and exactly when we’ll get there, but God doesn’t operate that way. He give us just enough revelation, just enough grace, just enough strength. Why? So we will live in daily dependence on Him. He doesn’t want us to rely on the revelation; He wants us to rely on Him. (pg 113 – Draw the Circle)

Just enough grace. Just enough strength. DAILY dependence on Him. Rely on Him.

Yes.

~Starr

27 thoughts on “Day 20: Halfway

  1. Oh, my…Starr!! God is working on you girl!! I have you on my prayer list…didn’t know for what, but this is CERTAINLY a reason. It comes to mind…when God supplied the manna for the Israelites, if they saved part for the next day, it would spoil, He wanted them to have faith that He would supply their needs every day! That simple, simple prayer taught in the Bible….give us THIS day our DAILY bread. But, yes…we want it all, we want it all RIGHT NOW, and WE WANT a concise detailing of the next twenty years…all wrapped up in a pretty package! Did Daniel have a clue what was in store when he refused to worship the false gods? NO..but he continued to open his window and pray three times a day to his GOD. I think he would have been BLOWN away had he gotten a glimpse of what God had in store. I’m praying for you..God has plans for you that could top what he had in mind for Daniel. Remember, when God says fall backward, and your’e looking Him in the eyes, He has the angels waiting to catch you.

    Happy Friday, ya’ll. GOD is GOOD!!
    Deb ๐Ÿ™‚

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    1. Thank you Aunt Debra! I was reading in Hebrews last night and it gives sooo many examples of those that had faith and what it looked like! Thank you for reminding me about Daniel – I had forgotten about how a big part of that story was praying – 3x a day – and sticking to it! Yes!! I want to fall backwards and know that God or His angels will be there to catch me. Love you and Happpy Friday!!!

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  2. Freida…I wish I were there with you. We would walk circles around your workplace until…until God moved some hearts, or moved you. I pray for you daily. I feel SO guilty because my workplace is so great. I walk in and am greeted with smiles and hugs, there’s Christian music coming thru the sound system, when things get tough, we have “prayer meetings” in the hallway…I LOVE what I do and where I work. Is everyday perfect?? No way, but I know that things are in HIS hands. I sometimes think that surely GOD in his greatness can and WILL change things for you. I love you and pray for you daily!!
    Your big sis…

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  3. I love this book and I love our daily devotion that goes along with it! I mean who’s excited about getting up before 6 on some days- ME! Today it was 5 am! I’ve always gotten up early to read my bible, that is not a struggle for me but at the same time my prayer/bible time had become a little vague, almost like I was going through the motions. ..not now! 20 days in and I don’t want it to end. Starr, I believe God is using this to prepare you for bigger things. I said to Mike after I heard you speak at your grandmother’s funeral that God has bigger things for you and sorry Brian……it doesn’t include real estate! God is stirring in all of our lives….exciting times. Happy Friday!

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    1. Marilyn, I’m so glad you are on this journey. You and I have both had a feeling for a while that God brought you to our team for a very specific time and season and to help me! Thank you and I’m trusting that God is stirring something in you for your family and the people in your path! Thank you for always encouraging me!

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  4. Well…Starr….hope you talked to Brian about this before now!! Hahaha. God has plans for you and when you write your book and speak to your first group I want family passes! Let go and let God. Great writing today. Great reading fro. The book. Great prayer time!

    Deb, you are very lucky. Most of the people mom and I work for are christians however mosts days it is hard to tell. Our building has been prayed over and I think this is why the devil atacks so hard. He knows when God has plans for his people.

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    1. Hahah Melissa, yeah – it’s been the topic of say a hundred or so conversations between me and Brian lately. It’s the topic of most date nights…fun times, huh?!? You will have a front row seat wherever God sends me. Who knows where that will be?!? And as far as our jobs, I fully believe that God has placed each of us exactly where He wants us for this season. Will he move us? Sometimes. Will He keep us in the craziness to learn and to influence those that need to see Him living through us? Sometimes. I’m asking God to reveal Himself to each of us in ways that we know His presence and that we live in that DAILY dependence on Him! Love you!

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  5. Good morning! I just parked in the parking lot at work. The half way mark of this prayer journey is a good place to start my marching in circles at work. This isn’t a Christian workplace but I do have Christian sisters and friends working here. I can make one circle and pass by the three sisters I work with who attend our church. I am going to pray for them specifically as I pass by and touch their cubicle. I am going to rebuke the power of satan as I walk. I will be praying a special prayer as I pass the desk where my boss sits and I will be praying for God to change me or change him, or remove me from standing in the way of God’s will. I have faith that today will draw me closer his will for my life, specifically where he wants me working the few years I have left before I can consider retirement. Starr, I am behind you and I know Brian is too. God is in control, let’s get out of His way!

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    1. Mom this brings happy tears to my eyes this morning. Know that you have people “marching” with you this morning – not in the physical sense, but our prayers are marching with you and cheering you on!!! Go God!!! We are moving – out of the way – and asking You to take charge!!

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  6. To all who are wondering – yes, I know that Starr isn’t fulfilled in her current job. She does it anyways because she knows that it impacts our family. I understand it impacts our family also but I am the one pushing her to make the change. If I am the one making her feel guilty for wanting to leave then I will be standing in God’s way of what He has for her. I will certainly not do that! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Thank you all for the encouragement you are giving Starr through this time. Continue to pray that God will give her strength to step out in faith. I know as much as y’all do that something BIG is going to happen by her obedience and I am patiently and anxiously awaiting for it to be revealed.

    Sorry for the long response, my prayer for today that I struggle with is for God to let me step out in faith and not wait on the twenty five year plan. I am one of the people that sometimes relies more on the plan than the God that gave the plan!

    Happy Friday!!
    – Brian

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    1. Your unconditional support and motivation means more to me than you will ever know. Thank you for walking on this journey with me, for dreaming with me and for leading our family to not be “normal.” I love you so much, Brain ๐Ÿ™‚

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  7. Starr, praying for you sister! You definitely have the talent to write but don’t rely on talent! Rely of God! Remember that God qualifies the called! You may have to take that first step blindly (which is so scary) but the vision/peace/confirmation/etc that comes as you see the second step approaching will most likely be amazing! God’s got this! Love you!

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    1. Brooke, YES! God qualifies the called! There is a section in the circle maker book that says this exact thing and it specifically relates to writers!! Thank goodness, cause I certainly can’t do this on my own talents!! Thank you for always going along with my crazy spontaneous journeys! Love u!

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  8. Oh, my….here I am thinking about you guys when I should be finishing my weekly newsletter, but tears are falling…in awe, in wonder, for Freida’s circles…I don’t know what we’re going to do come day 41, but this can’t stop. Was listening this morning to Michael English…LOVE his music, (yes, I know he wondered, but so did David)…Your Love Amazes Me…was written as a secular love song, but I think of it as His love for us. It says I’ve seen the wonders of the world, the colors of the rainbows, diamonds and pearls, BUT NOTHING compares…. your love amazes me,…I’ve prayed for miracles that never came, got down on my knees in the pouring rain…I want that…I want to KNOW HIM so badly that I would fall to my knees in the pouring rain (both physically and spiritually)…just to show Him THANKS for His amazing love…
    Ok, back to work!!
    ๐Ÿ™‚

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    1. Aunt Deb!! I love me some Michael English and those words are soooo good!! And don’t you worry, we will not stop. We will do something for sure ๐Ÿ™‚ and we won’t tell that you were thinking about us instead of doing your newsletter haha!!

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  9. Starr….I always include a spiritual thought in my newsletters….I just tweek from last year’s newsletter…HAD to share this week’s…just for you:

    Donโ€™t worry about skills you donโ€™t have. Donโ€™t covet strengths others have. Just extract your uniqueness. โ€œKindle afresh the gift of God which is in youโ€ (2 Timothy 1:6 NASB) . And do so to …make a big deal out of God.

    ๐Ÿ™‚

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  10. Starr, am praying for you and Brian. It is obvious to all of us that writing is one of your many gifts, and in His time He will bring it all together and use it to to glorify Him, even more, in a magnficant way. He has you stirred up and maturing you with this 40 day challenge. Day 41 will not be the end, it could be your beginning. Don’t wait for more revelation; be obedient to the amount of revelation God has given you. (pg. 113) The first chapter of day 20 and the first sentence of chapter 2 probably speaks to all of us who know it’s time to change directions. Loved this chapter, just like all the other ones it was written just for me.

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  11. Freida I am so happy that you walk circles around your job. Melissa and I did again this morning. Most everyone at work are believers but we have a student with us for the next 5 weeks who is not. She was asking Melissa and I what and why we were doing circles around the building. So Melissa and I told her what we were doing. We are walking 7 times around if we can’t get all 7 in before work we finish at lunch. By now several staff members are starting to question what we are up to. There was a chapter on crazy faith right? Like Melissa said I have been praying for a change for 2 and half years. As long as it takes God.

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    1. Karen!!!! God is sooo using you two to witness in a CRAZY way to your coworkers. Praying that the walls come tumbling down. Do you remember when we used to sing this in the early days of Children’s Church? Can I come blow the trumpet?!? Keep going and those prayers are going to have a lasting effect on you and all of those around you!!! Love u!

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  12. Hello friends! I made the circle at work this morning, reaching out to touch the walls around the desks of my sisters in Christ, just before they came in. I prayed for each of them, along with praying for my team members and my boss. While it was still another tough day, I had a spring in my step. What a great way to start my day!

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    1. And then I saw a photo of Firetrucks and people evacuating at your office first thing…all I could think was, “oh goodness, mom’s prayers brought down the fire of God in that place!!!” ๐Ÿ™‚

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